“How to be alone” ~ Tanya Davis

If you are at first lonely, be patient. 

If you’ve not been alone much, or if when you were, you weren’t 
okay with it, then just wait. You’ll find it’s fine to be alone 
once you’re embracing it. 

We can start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the 
coffee shop, the library, where you can stall and read the 
paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay 
there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books; 
you’re not supposed to talk much anyway so it’s safe there.

There is also the gym, if you’re shy, you can hang out with 
yourself and mirrors, you can put headphones in.

Then there’s public transportation, because we all gotta go 
places. 

And there’s prayer and mediation, no one will think less if 
your hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation. 

Start simple. Things you may have previously avoided based 
on your avoid being alone principles. 

The lunch counter, where you will be surrounded by chow
-downers, employees who only have an hour and their spouses 
work across town, and they, like you, will be alone. 

Resist the urge to hang out with your cell phone. 

When you are comfortable with eat lunch and run, take yourself 
out for dinner; a restaurant with linen and Silverware. You’re 
no less an intriguing a person when you are eating solo dessert 
and cleaning the whipped cream from the dish with your finger. 
In fact, some people at full tables will wish they were where 
you were. 

Go to the movies. Where it’s dark and soothing, alone in your 
seat amidst a fleeting community. 

And then take yourself out dancing, to a club where no one knows 
you, stand on the outside of the floor until the lights convince 
you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like no one’s 
watching because they’re probably not. And if they are, assume 
it is with best human intentions. The way bodies move genuinely 
to beats, is after all, gorgeous and affecting. Dance until 
you’re sweating. And beads of perspiration remind you of life’s 
best things, down your back, like a book of blessings. 

Go to the woods alone, and the trees and squirrels will watch 
for you. Go to an unfamiliar city, roam the streets, they are 
always statues to talk to, and benches made for sitting gives 
strangers a shared existence if only for a minute, and these 
moments can be so uplifting and the conversation you get in by 
sitting alone on benches, might have never happened had you not 
been there by yourself.  

Society is afraid of alone though. Like lonely hearts are wasting 
away in basements. Like people must have problems if after a while 
nobody is dating them. 

But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless, and 
lonely is healing if you make it. 

You can stand swathed by groups and mobs or hands with your 
partner, look both further and farther in the endless quest for 
company. 

But no one is in your head. And by the time you translate your 
thoughts an essence of them may be lost or perhaps it is just kept. 
Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those 
“sappy slogans” from pre-school over to high school groaning, 
we’re tokens for holding the lonely at bay. 

'Cause if you’re happy in your head, then solitude is blessed, 
and alone is okay. 

It’s okay if no one believes like you, all experience is unique, 
no one has the same synapses, can’t think like you, for this be 
relieved, keeps things interesting, life’s magic things in reach, 
and it doesn’t mean you aren’t connected, and the community is 
not present, just take the perspective you get from being one 
person in one head and feel the effects of it. 

Take silence and respect it. 

If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it, 
if your family doesn’t get you or a religious sect is not meant 
for you, don’t obsess about it. 

You could be in an instant surrounded if you need it. 

If your heart is bleeding, make the best of it. 

There is heat in freezing, be a testament.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Copyrights: Tanya Davis

Tanya Davis is a Canadian singer-songwriter and poet, based in 
Halifax, Nova Scotia. Her style is marked primarily by spoken 
word poetry set to music.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I couldn’t resist sharing this poem. So beautiful and touching. All credits to  Tanya Davis

Sisters

I saw those children in my compartment. She was with her sister, may be five or six years old.

While her sister was singing for their earning, she was looking at me and whispering something, may be she was repeating the words that her sister was singing.

I felt like they were alienated from the crowd and weren’t bothered at all.

Poor child, she didn’t know what she was doing there.

Only thing that I could have done was to look at them, I was helpless.

Date a girl who reads – II

 “So, what do you go for in a girl?”

 He crows, lifting a lager to his lips
 Gestures where his mate sits
 Downs his glass
 He prefers tits
 I prefer ass.
 What do you go for in a girl?” 

 I don’t feel comfortable
 The air left the room a long time ago
 All eyes are on me
 Well, if you must know 

 I want a girl who reads
 Yeah. Reads.
 I’m not trying to call you a chauvinist
 'Cos I know you’re not alone in this
 but… 

 I want a girl who reads
 Who needs the written word
 & uses the added vocabulary
 She gleans from novels and poetry
 To hold lively conversation
 In a range of social situations 

 I want a girl who reads
 Whose heart bleeds at the words of Graham Greene
 Or even Heat magazine
 Who’ll tie back her hair while reading Jane Eyre
 and goes cover to cover with each Waterstones three for two offer
 but I want a girl who doesn’t stop there 

 I want a girl who reads
 Who feeds her addiction for fiction
 With unusual poems and plays
 That she hunts out in crooked bookshops for days and days and days
 She’ll sit addicted at breakfast, soaking up the back of the cornflakes box
 And the information she gets from what she reads makes her a total fox
 Cos she’s interesting & unique
 & her theories make me go weak at the knees

 I want a girl who reads 

 A girl who’s eyes will analyze
 The menu over dinner
 Who’ll use what she learns to kick my ass in arguments
 so she always ends the winner
 But she’ll still be sweet and she’ll still be flirty
 Cos she loves the classics and the classics are dirty
 So late at night she’d always have me in a stupor
 As she paraphrases the raunchier moments from the works of Jilly Cooper

 See, some guys prefer asses
 Some prefer tits
 And I’m not saying that I don’t like those bits
 But what’s more important
 What supersedes
 For me
 Is a girl a with passion, wit and dreams
 So I want a girl who reads "

:- By Mark Grist

Mark Grist is a poet and battle rapper based in Peterborough, UK, who rose to prominence when his Don’t Flop rap battle against Mancunian MC Blizzard became an internet sensation.

Date a girl who reads

Girl reading a book

Girl reading a book

" You should date a girl who reads.

Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books 
instead of clothes, who has problems with closet space because she 
has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants 
to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.
Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will 
always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly 
looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly 
cries out when she has found the book she wants. You see that weird 
chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a secondhand book shop? 
That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, 
especially when they are yellow and worn. She’s the girl reading 
while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take 
a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top 
because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of 
the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as 
most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if 
she likes the book. 

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got 
through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she 
says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that 
to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would 
like to be Alice. It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her 
books for her birthday, for Christmas, for anniversaries. Give 
her the gift of words, in poetry and in song. Give her Neruda, 
Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that 
words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between 
books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life 
a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if 
she does. She has to give it a shot somehow. Lie to her. If she 
understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind 
words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It 
will not be the end of the world. Fail her. Because a girl who 
reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because 
girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but 
that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and 
again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain 
or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read 
understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the 
Twilight series. If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When 
you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, 
make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple 
of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if 
the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they 
always are.You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock 
concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.
You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst 
and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of 
your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. 
She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, 
maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age 
together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you 
shake the snow off your boots.Date a girl who reads because you 
deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful 
life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours 
and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you 
want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads. 
Or better yet, date a girl who writes. "

- Rosemarie Urquico

image is taken from ‘http://underthepyramids.tumblr.com/post/554254598/girl-reading’